Imagine being in so much emotional turmoil that it feels like the only way to get relief would be to end your life or harm yourself. This is one of the darkest places a human being can be. It isn’t fair that one of the clearest ways to stay safe and get help requires buckets of bravery you probably don’t feel like you have to spare.

There are a lot of stigmas and misconceptions surrounding mental health hospitalization. As someone who has been hospitalized three times, once involuntarily and then twice voluntarily, I would like to lay some of your worries to rest.

While being hospitalized is certainly not all fun and games or rainbows and puppies, I have found all of the above during my hospital stays. Collies came and visited us for pet therapy. We bowled down the hallway with plastic balls and pins. We listened to our music therapist perform Creep by Radiohead. I have painted rainbow headbands and colored Lisa Frank pages. Mental health units are one of the only places where it’s socially acceptable for an adult to wear a blanket as a cape and carry a stuffed animal around, and I personally love that.

I have made some good friends during my hospital stays. One of my best friends and I bonded over fuzzy socks and the concept of therapy dragons.

There are no straightjackets. Use of padded rooms is rare. Forcible injections are rare. Involuntary electroconvulsive therapy is extremely rare. Rather, the difficult and scary things are the losses of freedom and sometimes dignity. During intake, it’s common to have to remove clothing to ensure you have no weapons. This is more extreme in some cases than others.

The nurses will put your phone in a locker and keep it until you are discharged. You have to share the unit phone with others. The good hospitals will treat you like an adult. In these places, it’s okay to stay up all night if you can’t sleep, it’s okay to get a snack whenever you want, and it’s okay to skip group therapy sessions. Please bear in mind, every hospital is different. I highly recommend Columbus Regional Health.

Here are some tips. Bring a notebook with phone numbers in it, and make sure it’s paperback and not spiral-bound. There might be a library there, but bring paperback books. Wear shoes that don’t have laces. If you wear hair ties, make sure they don’t have metal bits on them.

It’s not easy. Nothing about mental illness is ever easy, but I want you to be safe. Please keep fighting for your happiness.