By Les Linz
Seven? Yes — we are not alone.
If you go to weather.com (as I did) and put in “Seymour,” you find a total of seven municipalities identifying themselves that way (an eighth refers to a river region in the Squamish nation of 4,000 indigenous Vancouver, British Columbia, residents).
What caused me to do that?
I needed to come up with my next column and figured if I wind up making fun of Seymour, it better not be the Hoosier version alone.
More on the six Seymour sibling cities in a moment, but for those not familiar with the Indiana hamlet, it was settled in 1816 by James Shields and family. The first train robbery (1866) was alleged to have been committed here by the Reno Brothers some 25 years after trains began passing through town. Fast forward to modern times.
Seymour gladly brags on native son John Cougar Mellencamp (a newly produced mural of him graces a town park).
Even more significant?
It has a phenomenal Oktoberfest to attend every first weekend in October, the smells of which will get you higher than the strongest legalized marijuana.
The latest U.S. Census numbers (20,389) show a population increase of nearly 16½% from the previous tally and a growth of 3.2% in the last two years alone. On top of that, we have a mayor with former business ownership experience and real estate taxes so low that even limbo is envious.
Do yourself a favor if you find need for a new state and town to reside in, check out Seymour, Indiana, and tell ‘em Les sent you.
Seymour, Tennessee, was founded in 1783 by Sevier County pioneer Samuel Newell. The 2018 population was 11,193.
I went to The Mountain Press online and found a nifty story about the Hylton family that plans to open up a family-friendly pool hall by July 2021. With a name like Hylton, they have to be accommodating.
I imagine a “family-friendly pool hall” will include cue sticks cleverly disguised as jumbo syringes. You still shoot the ball as you normally would except you do it from 6 feet away, so a bridge is definitely in order. Pool shooters will likely be required to play while wearing either a Paul Newman or Jackie Gleason mask. The hall’s owners previously worked for both Dollywood and a cruise line, so it should be a blast.
If billiards isn’t your favorite pastime, Seven Islands State Birding Park is nearby, east of Knoxville by the French Broad River, and Historic Marble Springs cabin and farm tours await you a little south of Knoxville.
Information: themountainpress.com
Seymour, Connecticut, has a population of 16,540 as of the 2020 Census, founded in May 1850 and named for then-Gov. Thomas H. Seymour. With a state abbreviation of CT, there’s undoubtedly no secret you can keep from any government official there. Diverse forms of interesting architecture found all around town have a home on the National Register of Historic Places.
Apparently there is a “Griffin” Department of Public Health, which makes me think they are one seriously confused entity.
Information: valley.newhavenindependent.org/archives/category/seymour
Seymour, Wisconsin, is a little smaller (but not smallest) and comes in with a 2019 population count of 3,455, first settled in 1857 by William and John Ausbourne. It was founded in 1868 and named after Gov. Horatio Seymour of New York. The original settlers built a log cabin when they ran out of road and were the only home for two years (where can I find a community like that now)?
The Wisconsin version was recognized as a town in 1877, and in 1883, it became the smallest incorporated city in America. Home of the Hamburger/Railroad Museum and Seymour Area Historical Society Museum. Don’t miss the Hamburger Hall of Fame.
Information: gopresstimes.com
Seymour, Missouri, was founded in 1881 and incorporated 14 years later. Two years ago, the population tally came in at 2,022. According to some, the community name is a transfer from Seymour, Indiana (I’ve heard of that). Their post office has been in operation since 1871.
The merchants association holds an annual apple festival the second weekend of every September, and the Ozark Mennonite School holds an apple butter day fundraiser event on the third Saturday of October to support the school.
A recent town paper reported on “3 chases, 3 caught.”
Information: webstercountycitizen.com
Seymour, Texas, was originally founded as Oregon City by Oregon settlers. The town name was changed in 1879 to honor cowboy Seymour Munday.
The Old Settlers Reunion and Rodeo has been held each July since 1896. Fun fact (at least for those like me like that can’t stand the cold): On Wednesday, Aug. 12, 1936, our southwestern namesake saw the highest ever recorded Fahrenheit temperature in the state of Texas: 120 degrees (You don’t like the weather in Seymour? Just wait a moment. It will change).
Information: baylorbanner.com
Seymour, Victoria, Australia, is at the southern end of the Goulburn Valley in the Shire of Mitchell, Victoria, Australia, about 65 miles north of Melbourne. In 1841, the government decided the new crossing place was the likely spot for a town. Plans were laid before the executive council of NSW, and a Mr. Mitchell proposed the name Seymour, which was approved Dec. 21, 1843. The town was named after Lord Seymour, the son of the 11th Duke of Somerset.
Puckapunyal Army base (with five Army schools located on campus) can be found here. Many wineries. Our Aussie “cousin” boasts of diverse sports and a government-run school (“Prep to year 12”) as well as a vocational tech high school. In 2016, the town boasted of a population of 6,327.
According to the Seymour, Australia, Telegraph newspaper, World No. 2 tennis player Novak Djokovic could face a hefty fine for touching chair umpire Damien Dumusois during a volatile Australian Open final on a recent Sunday night. Hopefully for him, the umpire won’t strike back.
Information: seymourtelegraph.com.au/tennis/2020/02/02/1016036/djokovic-could-face-fine-for-umpire-touch
Conclusion? It was the best of signs, it was the worst of signs.
Les Linz of Seymour writes the “Humor: More or Les” column. For information about Linz, visit his amazon.com author page. Send comments to [email protected].