Letter: Letter to the Editor, Don Hill


To the editor:

Robocalls, yes, we are all sick and tired of them. All we can do is hang up. Sorry, it does no good to try to reason with it. Robots don’t reason. No need to try to get off the list. Robots don’t delete. No need to talk to it. Robots don’t listen. Even if you ever got through to a human they wouldn’t have any idea how to stop the thing. Robots don’t stop. All we can do is hang up and cuss.

What is worse is trying to call them. Example: wife and I get a bill from a new account we know about. We know that it is legit. The bill is beautiful. It is designed by some expensive company. It tells everything about the company, it tells us how much we owe. It tells us all the benefits we get. It tells us everything except — who do we write the check to?

 Oh well, no problem. We will just call them and ask. Yes, they did have a phone number on the bill. So just dial the number and ask the person who answers the phone – who do we write the check to? Wrong.

First you get the menu. Press one if you want to do this. Press two if you want to do this. Press three if you want to do this. After the robot has gone through eight or ten numbers to press, none of them list — who do we write the check to? Don’t bother yelling at it. Don’t try to interrupt it. Just press any number and a person will answer, right? Wrong. It will only refer you to another number. Please don’t cuss into the phone. The neighbors can now hear you. Do not throw the phone. They are breakable.

Of course, if you should ever get a human they would first ask your name, your birth date, your mother’s name, the name of the dog you had when you were ten, and last, they would ask, “what is a check?” Please don’t yell at her. She is probably babysitting ten kids and trying to cook dinner at the same time as she is making a few extra bucks by answering the phone and getting cussed at all day.

I remember when you picked up the phone a real lady would ask, “number please.” And if you forgot the number she would say, “Oh, is this Mildred? You must be calling the Do-Drop-Inn Bar. I heard your husband was there an hour ago. I’ll give them a call.”

Don Hill, Seymour

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